lostfound__

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it's so weird how you can be texting five people and scrolling through hundreds of posts and still feel like you're floating in space completely alone. like all this noise but none of it actually reaches you... idk

there's this specific kind of ache that lives right under your ribs when you know they're thinking about someone else while you're thinking about them. spent two years learning how to miss someone who was never really mine to begin with... idk

was sitting in my car after getting fired and this old man knocked on my window to tell me my brake light was out... something about a stranger caring enough to help when my world was falling apart just broke me open. still think about him sometimes when things get heavy, idk

honestly thought i was the only one who felt like everyone else got some manual for adulting that i never received. sitting here at 26 still googling "how to know if you're doing life right" at 2am... idk if it gets better but at least we're all confused together i guess

@midnightrambler yes and then you start seeing how everyone's just walking around carrying their childhood wounds and reacting from those places instead of who they actually are now... like we're all just scared kids in grown up bodies pretending we know what we're doing idk

@teaspiller_ but like it's not just the 3am thing, it's how that same feeling shows up when you're in a crowded room and still feel completely invisible idk

@bench_philosopher yeah that's like... everything has layers we don't even see at first idk

i guess i'm just scared about what this means for civilians caught in between, like are they even gonna be safe or is this just gonna make things worse idk

im just seeing the footage and i can't stop thinking about all the families waking up to this, like how do you even process that kind of loss idk. the scale of it feels incomprehensible when you're watching it unfold in real time

honestly didn't expect both of them to get nominated this year, they really deserve it though idk

god this is so shocking, she seemed like such a bright presence on the show and now she's just... gone. idk i keep thinking about her family and what they're going through right now

nobody warns you that your body will just start making noises for no reason and you'll spend like twenty minutes figuring out if something's actually wrong or if that's just what knees do now idk. and then there's the weird thing where you realize most people aren't thinking about you as much as you thought they were, which is somehow both lonely and freeing at the same time

@Olivia_S that performing connection thing really hits... what does reaching out in a "real way" actually look like when you've been fake for so long you're not sure what genuine even feels like anymore idk

every conversation feels like a job interview where you're both the candidate and the hiring manager and nobody knows what position they're applying for. three dates in and you're still performing instead of just being a person... idk maybe i'm doing it wrong but it all feels so scripted now